Men Commit the Crime, Girls Pay the Price: The Silent Victims of Afghanistan’s “Baad” Practice
Five years ago, when Shirin was just 15, she was dressed in bridal clothes and a wedding veil. But that day did not mark the beginning of a married life for her. Instead, it marked the start of years of suffering, humiliation and deprivation.
She was given in “baad” to the family of a man whose killing her brother had been involved in, even though she herself had played no role in the crime.
Shirin is now 20. She says that throughout the past five years, she has lived in a household where she is seen not as a wife, but as compensation for a killing. Members of her husband’s family humiliate her and tell her that she has no value.
“I am 20 years old, and I was given in baad because my brother was involved in a killing,” Shirin says. “Now this family tells me, ‘You have no value. You are only a slave.’ I am tortured every day. I have endured this for five years.”
Shirin is not alone. In some parts of Afghanistan, girls are still handed over to another family not by their own choice, but to end a feud, settle the blood price for a killing, or preserve what some families consider their “honor.” The practice is known as “baad.”
Under this practice, a crime committed by a man can change a girl’s life forever. She may have had no role in the killing or in the dispute between the two families, yet she is made to pay the price through the loss of her freedom, dignity and future.
For generations, when fighting or disputes between two families resulted in a death, local elders would often try to end the hostility through a jirga, or traditional council. In some areas, one way of resolving such disputes was to give a daughter or sister from the family of the person who committed the killing to the victim’s family. This practice, known as baad, can also involve underage girls.
Shirin says that in her husband’s family, she is seen not as a wife but as someone who must pay for her brother’s crime.
“This is a bad practice,” she says. “My brother had the problem, but he is free and living his life. I will remain imprisoned in this house for his crime as long as I am alive.”
Shirin was 15 when she entered a marriage she says she knew almost nothing about. She says no wedding ceremony was held for her; a mullah simply performed the marriage.
According to Shirin, her husband is around 40 years old and already had another wife and six children.
“I did not understand many things,” she says. “There was no wedding celebration for me. The mullah just performed the marriage and left. After that night, they told me I had to go to my husband’s house. My husband is much older than me. He has another wife and six children.”
Shirin says she has never felt that she was treated with the dignity or status of a wife in the household. Instead, she says, she has largely been treated like someone guilty of a crime.
Baad is not practised across all of Afghanistan, but in some areas, including parts of Helmand and Kandahar, it is still used in some cases to settle family and tribal disputes.
In parts of southern and southwestern Afghanistan, many family and tribal disputes are resolved through jirgas. In some cases, women and girls are handed over to the opposing family as part of a settlement or as compensation for a crime.
Tribal elders in Helmand say economic hardship, efforts to end long-running feuds and a lack of awareness are among the factors that allow the practice to continue.
“Economic problems, ending a feud, and a lack of information and awareness lead some people to give their daughter or sister in baad,” Noorullah, a tribal elder in Helmand, told Zan News.
He adds that some families still see baad as a way to preserve family “honor” or end a feud, while women and girls ultimately bear the consequences of those decisions.
Zainab, another woman in Kandahar, says she too became a victim of the same practice.
According to her, in 2023, a fight broke out between her father and the brother of her current husband. Her father killed the man during the confrontation. A tribal jirga was then held to settle the dispute, and it decided that Zainab would be given to the dead man’s brother.
“When my father fought with my husband’s brother, my father stabbed and killed him,” Zainab says. “Because of that, the people and the tribe held a jirga and gave me to the brother of the man who was killed.”
She says that after the marriage, she even lost the right to visit her father’s home or see her relatives.
“After this marriage, I was no longer allowed to go to my father’s house,” Zainab says. “My husband told me, ‘You have no right to go to your father’s home or visit your other relatives.’”
Mental health specialists say forced marriages and living in conditions where a person’s autonomy and dignity are disregarded can have serious psychological consequences for women and girls, with effects that may also extend to their children.
Shahla Naimi, a mental health specialist, says women who are forced into marriage against their will can develop serious psychological and emotional problems.
“If a woman is married against her will, she can develop mental health problems,” Naimi says. “Many women and girls come for help because this is the source of their problems, and some develop severe psychological conditions.”
According to her, the harm is not limited to the woman herself. Children growing up in such families may also be affected by the consequences.
“What is even worse is that children born to such parents are affected by the disrespect and devaluation directed at their mother,” Naimi says. “A generation can grow up with serious psychological problems because the structure of the family has broken down.”
Although baad continues to be practised in some parts of Afghanistan, there are no precise figures on how many women and girls have been forced into marriage through this practice in recent years.
The Taliban, however, say their administration opposes forced marriage and does not allow families to marry off girls against their will.
But the accounts of women such as Shirin and Zainab show that for victims of baad, the issue goes beyond forced marriage. They can spend years paying the price for crimes they did not commit.
Shirin is now 20 and has spent five years of her life in a household where she says she is held responsible for a crime committed by her brother.
For her, and for women like Zainab, baad is not the end of a feud between men. It is the beginning of a punishment that women and girls may live with for years.
